Instead of just posting about green things, I figure I’d post about the most ungreen, unsustainable, unnecessary crap in America. Why just America? Because the Chinese government scares me.
If you have an idea for The Biggest Wastes Ever, post it below and take the credit!
Burning Man
hippy waste
Now you may be asking yourself “How can a bunch of hippies in the middle of the dessert doing drugs and running around naked be wasteful?” Well, I’ll be more than happy to tell you. Despite last year’s Burning Man being green themed, it was the most wasteful of all other Burning Man’s in the history of Burning Man. Why? Because it was also the biggest Burning Man ever and, Burning man being inherently wasteful, means the bigger it gets the more waste gets produced. Here’s the basic rundown:
- Move 48,000 people from all across the world.
- Bring all the crap they need to survive in the desert for 5-7 days (food, water, fuel, drugs).
- Bring or ship all their art and structures.
- Drive about 20,000 vehicles into the dessert most of which are trucks, RV’s, and tractor trailers (distanced traveled can range anywhere from 3,000 to 30 miles).
- Run generators 24 hrs a day to light up everything and cool the RV’s.
- Consume, burn, or dump EVERYTHING you brought.
To be fair, you don’t dump all your trash in the desert in a giant pile. Instead, you pile it into your car or trailer and then unload it at the nearest dump (about 50 miles away). My camp (just 10 people) resulted in about fifteen 13-gallon bags of trash. That’s 195 gallons of trash for only ten people! Now imagine 48,000 people consuming, burning, and driving:
i think i can see god crying
And all of these resources are consumed for what? ”Self-expression, self-reliance, and art as the center of community?” What a freaking joke. This is the most egocentric, hedonistic, flashy waste ever imaginable. Want to express yourself? Start a journal. Want self-reliance? Move out of your parents house. Want art to be the center of your community? Then make art that you don’t burn five days later.
Don’t get me wrong, I had an AMAZING time at Burning Man but towards the final days there I realized what Burning Man really was and still is: a self-involved waste. After seeing what a huge waste it all was, I did a little thought experiment that went a little something like this:
Including the cost of the ticket, travel, camp fees and supplies going to Burning Man can conservatively cost anywhere from $800-1500. Instead of using that money to throw a huge party what if 48,000 people got together each year and contributed their talents and $1,000.00 to help end world hunger or revolutionize energy consumption? The real rub is that if you ask 100 people at Burning Man if they care about the environment 99 of them would probably answer yes or give you a light show.
And on the Other End of the Spectrum…NASCAR!!!
pointless
Yes, the most popular sport in America is also the biggest waste ever. I know this will piss off about half of America, but I could really care less. NASCAR sucks and that half of America sucks. Thirty-five to forty-three cars that get two to three mpg line up and race in a circle, WHOPEE! I’m sure there are some dudes out there that will say “Man, you have clearly never been to a race, you’ve never felt the speeeeeeed.”
this guy should cut back on the speed.
Guess what? I’ve been to a race before and I’ve felt the “speed.” But after lap 12314198019 the speed got boring and all I wanted to see was a fiery wreck of steel and rubber. Let’s be honest here, that’s what most of the people who watch NASCAR want to see. They don’t want to see cars drive in circles for hours, that’s boring. They want to witness a gut-wrenching pileup of flesh and metal. In that case why don’t we just cut to the chase and sponsor a real life MECHWARRIOR battle, the franchise could use a rejuvenating bump anyways.
pew pew
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